GREEN EGGS AND HAM
Recently I wrote a review of the book listed above. I won’t go into my impressions of the book as
a whole. I just wanted to talk about the
author’s bizarre diet.
She’s a proponent of “food combining,” which means certain
foods should only be combined with certain other foods, but never with the
foods with which they should not be combined.
If you think that sentence was confusing, look at the chart.
Now, the way the author explained it, you eat protein for
breakfast and lunch, and carbs for dinner.
Ok, so far it sounds like Slim Fast plus Lean Cuisine. But apparently it is much more
complicated. You can’t eat sweet fruits
with acid fruits, but sub-acid fruits are ok.
Melons are so volatile they get a category of their own. So much for scooping cottage cheese from the
cantaloupe half. It seems lettuce and
celery can be combined with just about anything, but heaven help you if you put
tomatoes on your salad.
The chief celebrity proponent of the food combining diet is
Suzanne Somers, famous for her role as the iconic Dumb Blond in the 70’s sitcom
“Three’s Company.” The show ended some
25 or so years ago, and Somers has been making a steady living as a Hollywood
Has-Been ever since. She specializes in
helping American women obsess over the inadequate quality of their body parts.
Two words: Thigh Master.
Like all diets with web sites and books, this one has
assorted medical professionals and scientists (who presumably were not trained
by the Kansas State Board of Education, but who knows?) that attest to the
validity of the principles espoused.
Since all the diets have principles which conflict with the principles
of other diets, one can only conclude that one ought not to combine diets. Or combine scientists. Send ‘em all to Kansas.
The scientists defending this diet explain that because of
the way human digestion works with enzymes and hormones and stuff, if you eat
the wrong things together you get all mixed up and don’t digest it
properly. This somehow results in
American humans being, on average, the size of whales, who sensibly never
combine pasta with their seafood.
For reasons not explained by the scientists, this principle
does not affect the Japanese, who have been combining rice (starch!) and fish
(protein!) for centuries. Nor does it
seem to bother the Italians who recklessly top their spaghetti with
marinara. Perhaps Ameicans have
particularly sensitive enzymes.
Well enough of that.
I’ve got to go pack the kids’ school lunches. Alas, the chart does not address the question
of peanut butter and jelly.