STUPID HUMAN TRICKS, PART TOO NUMEROUS TO MENTION
Since my husband rarely arrives before 9, I was dismayed when I heard his car pull in at 7:30 pm. I met him at the door.
“There’s an explanation for this,” I said.
The look he gave me can only be described as “askance.”
Surveying the scene, he noted the wide open windows, the roaring of various fans, and that smell.
“What did you DO?” he asked.
“I can explain!” I said.
I began, “Well, Tigger called her friend Lulu to find out why she wasn’t in school.”
“And Lulu said she wasn’t in school because she has lice.”
“Mmm hmm….” His eyebrow went up.
“And so I had to check Tigger’s head for lice.”
“So I combed through her hair with the nit comb.”
“Yeah….” He began to look impatient.
“So when I was done, I wanted to sterilize the comb, even though I didn’t find anything, just, you know, because.”
His expression reflected increasing comprehension.
“So I put it in a pot of water and turned on the burner.”
“Ah,” he achieved full comprehension.
“And then I left the room.”
“The pot boiled dry and then the comb…”
“Melted it, did you?” Truth be told, the odor told the whole story.
I showed him the fragments that remained of the red plastic-handled nit comb. He seemed pleased.
“What are you smiling about?” I asked him.
“It wasn’t MY fault!”
Xanga now allows us non-premium-paying peons to subscribe to 20 blogrings! I went looking for some new ones to join and, well, I had to start one instead. Feel free to join the I Need A New Blogring blogring.
In other news, Dick Cheney’s former Chief of Staff I. Lewis Libby has been convicted of perjury and obstructing justice. As a result, he has officially changed his nickname from “Scooter” to “Red Shirt.”
NOTE: If you are excessively young, or you failed to spend your formative years watching old Star Trek episodes, you won’t get the joke. However, you may be better off for it.
People, I can’t believe you don’t know about red shirts.