HOW SWEET IT IS
If you have kids, you know about the Candy Problem. It works like this: everyone gives your kids candy. They get candy at the bank. They
get candy at the doctor’s office (sugar free, but still…), they get
candy from the bowls on the counter at restaurants, and they get candy
in the goodie bags handed out at the end of birthday parties. Add
all of that to the candy haul from Halloween, Christmas, Valentine’s
Day, and Easter, and you’re talking multiple pounds of sugar per year.
At our house, we dump all accumulated candy into a jar in the kitchen. We dole the candy out pretty stingily, so it tends to pile up. Fortunately, we get some help in dealing with the excess. We call our helper the Candy Monster.
You
never know what night the Candy Monster is going to come, but every now
and then, when everyone is sleeping, he comes and steals all the candy
from the jar. Surprisingly, this doesn’t upset the kids. Probably because they know there’s always more where that came from.
The other day, though, the girls got invited to the next-door neighbors’ house for their little girl’s birthday party. Of course they came home with bags of candy. Tigger taped her purple goodie bag tightly shut before depositing it in the candy jar. Then she took out some paper and wrote this:
Dear Candy Monster,
You may notice there is a purple bag of candy in the jar. Please do not take this, as this is my emergency stash. Please accept this drawing instead.
Sincerely, Tigger
Below the letter Tigger drew a picture of herself and the Candy Monster as she imagines he might look. They are gazing at each other with big smiles, and a sign between them reads “friends.”
I don’t know if this strategy will work, but I applaud the child’s initiative. It is never too early to form alliances with powerful people.
Transvestite Rabbit 
You sure the candy monster in the drawing doesn’t look a little bit like T-Geek?
I’m surprised she didn’t just stow this particular favorite in her room!That’s what I do!
hee hee that’s awesome
I like the way she thinks. The candy monster in our house finally pitched the last of the Easter candy. It seems a waste, but I suppose it’s actually better to toss it than to ingest it.
That’s fantastic! When I have kids I think I’ll impliment that strategy.
Alliances with powerful people…I love this! The midnight monster goes to the freezer for ice cream at our house. He once got caught by a freezer door that had been booby-trapped with pots and pans, noisy things to bring the kids running!
Parade season was when our candy pileups were worst.
It would be funny if the IRS works this way. Hey, don’t take my money, accept my drawing instead.
but those people only have power if we give it to them right?…
Has it occured to you that Tigger has the soul of a politician? Sweet talking her opponent, and in lieu of the photo op, she made a drawing op instead.
Your child is going far in life–what savvy!
One of my suppliers encloses a small bag of candy with every shipment, and none of it is anything we want to eat. I give it to my stepdaughter for her classrooom reward jar.
ROFL!!! She’s such a smart kiddo. I just know she’ll go far in the world. I’m genuinely impressed.
Bahahah you have one hell of a smart kid! Wow – Awesome!
Please post the pic of the Candy Monster. I want to be able to recognize the enemy when I see him.
I don’t anything like the picture…
CM
That Tigger’s a keeper.
We have had this candy issue as well. For a while we had a “no sugar at school” policy because the teachers were always giving the kids candy, and I would find candy wrappers in all their jean pockets when doing the laundry. Then one day Youngest called from school asking if she could have a cookie, which made us feel cruel, so now we just find their candy as they sleep and “disappear” it. They usually never even realize it’s gone, because, as you mentioned, there’s always more where that came from. *sigh*
We don’t have this problem because Chip, for reasons I cannot comprehend, doesn’t really care for candy.
I know. He LOOKS like me, but still…
I’m imagining the Candy Monster as resembling the Cookie Monster, but stickier.
There is no candy in my house because I am the candy monster. If it’s there, I eat it. I have a particular regard for chocolate.
Dang, I wish I’d thought of having the Candy Monster visit OUR house way bsck when! My strategy was to let them eat all they wanted periodically. Our major issue was Halloween. Not that much comes in to the house at other times. But I’d let them eat as much as they wanted for a set period of time each day. They’d be eagerly searching for “the best” and so would take a bite and spit it out and throw the rest away if they didn’t like it. I hated “the waste” on the one hand but was happy to them end up not eating too much.
The Candy Monster is fat and full of cavities and beats up on the Tooth Fairy whenever he gets a chance.
that’s too funny! you’re nicer than me. I just say, “give that me, you’re not eating all of that.” grumble, grumble.
Sadly, I am the candy monster. I don’t even keep candy in the house if I can help it. But I’d rather be addicted to sugar than addicted to fast food, although french fries would last in a cookie jar longer than candy. They don’t taste nearly as good after a couple of days.
I think she must be the smartest Tigger on the planet. Too cute. What a negotiator. 🙂 Lisa
Brilliant…I’m going to try that same trick with my boss.
How frikin cute is that???????
“…he might look.” Are we so sure the Candy Monster isn’t a Candee Monstress? I have some stash. But it’s not for emergencies.
Are you really listening to that??
RYC: I kinda figgered that.
I always thought Tigger was the sharpest of them all and this proves it – keep your friends close, and your enemies closer. Good on her!
How creative! I applaud her!
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